Access Denied

Besides the fact that it is usually quicker to actually walk to the Google headquarters in California and hunt through old file cabinets to find what you would like to search for rather than using the search engine from your room, internet access here at the Air Force Academy has always had more restrictions than anywhere else in the country. The big push a year ago was to switch over to the new .edu network. Before, the Academy was on the same .mil network that everyone else in the real Air Force was on. This internet was heavily restricted, mainly to keep Airmen doing something productive instead of looking at porn and playing video games at work.

Saving bandwidth for doing actual work is definitely a good idea in the operational Air Force, but what happens when you live in the same place where you do your work? As cadets, the only available internet in the room was this super-sterilized .mil internet. Then one day, following the example of the Coast Guard Academy, USAFA switched over to a .edu network. Sitting in the upper level of the library for two hours to get my computer revamped, I happened to ask the question of what the change was going to mean to us cadets on an everyday basis. The response was that the new .edu network would lessen the restrictions on the internet and we could surf the web happily ever after. What that actually translated into is that now we have YouTube.

Since I was a Doolie, I've been making notes of blocked websites and the reasons about why they were blocked. Oh yes, not only does USAFA deny access to certain sites, but some person takes time out of their day to type up the reasoning of why they decided to block them. After I'm blocked off of something ridiculous, I usually tell someone that matters and every once and a while it becomes unblocked. (That's my disclaimer for those of you cadets who try the sites I mention here that turn out not to be blocked anymore.) For those of you that still don't believe me I'd be happy to send you the print screen of the site and the reason. Without further ado, I'd like to present:

Squadron Angry Ranter's Top 16 Blocked Sites

16. Site: sales.geico.com/quote.do
Reason: Certificate error
You will not save money on your car insurance!

15. Site: spaceandmotion.com/metaphysics-immanuel-kant.htm
Reason: Education/Reference;Nudity;Sexual Materials
Up until this time I was unaware that Immanuel Kant was only photographed completely nude.

14. Site: images.search.yahoo.com
Reason: Open Image/Media Servers
I did a search for "Middle East map" and this is what I was greeted with. But it makes sense because there is obviously no reason I would ever need a map of the Middle East for any of my classes . . . ever.

13. Site: bankofamerica.com
Reason: Phishing;Financial Services
This was especially convenient when Bank of America was my primary bank where all my money was.

12. Site: newblackpanther.com
Reason: Political/Activist Groups
As a Political Science major, I sometimes have to deal with "politics" or groups involved with politics. Not under USAFA's watch!

11. Site: nextdayid.com
Reason: Illegal/Questionable
I was trying to get an International Student Identification Card for discounts when I was going to travel to Europe, but to the powers that be it looked "questionable."

10. Site: microsoft.com/windows/ie/downloads/default.mspx
Reason: Business;Computing/Internet
Trying to update my Internet Explorer, I was denied access because of such shady practices of "business" and the "internet." Oh no!

09. Site: edodo.org AND theonion.com
Reason: Adult/Mature Content;Humor/Jokes
Another classic, because we are not adults, cannot handle mature content, and have no business engaging in humor.

8. Site: fastmp3player.com
Reason: Suspicious
I thought nothing could top "questionable" until this.

7. Site: cyprusweekly.com/cy/
Reason: News/Media
Sites that give you news and/or media should be banned. What?

6. Site: economist.com
Reason: Business/Economy
You know they're probably right, The Economist newspaper has a horrible reputation and we should focus on ironing and not the "economy."

5. Site: mail.yahoo.com
Reason: Email
Back to snail mail cadets!

4. Site: gunthernet.com
Reason: Adult/Mature Content;Arts/Entertainment
This is personally insulting because Gunther and the Sunshine Girls is my favorite band of all time. So we've now gotten rid of "humor," "jokes," "arts" and "entertainment." What a life.

3. Site: myspace.com
Reason: Dating/Social
Classic site that's still denied today. Thank you upper leadership for preventing me from having any sort of dating or social life!

2. Site: britishairways.com
Reason: Travel
I'm speechless, really.

1. Site: ucl.ac.uk/dpu-projects/Global_Report/pdfs/Ibadan_bw.pdf
Reason: Education
I don’t even know what to tell you. I can’t make this stuff up.